Simantonnayana ( Sanskrit : सीमन्तोन्नयन , Sīmantonnayana ) (literally: parting the hair) or Simantha , is the third of the 16 Saṃskāras ( sacraments , rites of passage) in the ancient texts of Hinduism . It is observed in the last trimester of pregnancy to wish for safe delivery and is similar to a baby shower .
35-445: The authorities are not unanimous whether this saṃskāra should be performed for the first child or it should be performed for every child. Simantonnayana, also called Simanta or Simantakarana , literally means "parting the hair upwards". The significance of the ritual is to wish a healthy development of the baby and safe delivery to the mother. Simantonnayana ritual is described in many Gryhasutra texts, but Kane states that there
70-558: A sonogram . Moreover, although traditional baby showers were female-exclusive, mixed-sex showers have increased in frequency. Baby showers and other social events to celebrate an impending or recent birth are popular around the world, but not in Western Europe. They are often women-only social gatherings. Some baby showers are directed at fathers . These may be more oriented towards drinking beer, watching sports, fishing, or playing video games. The primary nature of these gifts
105-456: A "monstrous imposition", although she was referring to the attitude of demanding gifts and not necessarily the male version of a baby shower. In Hungary, such an event is called a milking party, and is held by tradition in favor of the mother to be blessed with breast milk for the newborn. Practically, it is the last day-off of the father for some time as he is expected to stay home to help. No similar domestic custom exists for mothers, such as
140-459: A baby shower before the baby is born, and gifts are usually sent after the birth, unrelated to a party. In the US, if a baby shower does not happen before the arrival of the baby, a sip-and-see party or other similar events can be organized after the birth. Guests bring small gifts for the expectant parent. Typical gifts related to babies include diapers , blankets, baby bottles , clothes, and toys. It
175-473: A baby shower. Gifts for the baby are given on the first visit to his/her home. This, due to health concerns, happens at the appropriate and suitable time for each counterpart. Bridal shower A bridal shower is a gift-giving party held for a bride-to-be in anticipation of her wedding . The history of the custom is rooted not necessarily for the provision of goods for the upcoming matrimonial home, but to provide goods and financial assistance to ensure
210-411: A close female family member to host the baby shower. Pre-birth baby showers may be held late in the pregnancy, but not usually during the last few weeks, in case of a pre-term birth. Many cultures do not have pre-birth celebrations. When a baby shower is held after a baby's birth, an invitation to attend the shower may be combined with a baby announcement . In China, it is considered unlucky to have
245-486: A custom related to the North American bridal shower, known as a Kitchen Tea, was traditionally held before the wedding. During a Kitchen Tea, female friends and family members would gather at the bride's family home for an afternoon tea, where they would give kitchen-related gifts to the bride. Recently, the influence of American culture has seen a rise in the prevalence of American-style bridal showers as opposed to
280-545: A gift-giving occasion, everyone who attends the shower is expected to bring a small gift. People who decline the invitation for any reason are not expected to send a gift or otherwise participate in the party. The hosts are expected to hand over gifts, or favors . These can be small gifts like chocolate coins that have been personalized with the name of the bride and the date of the event or a simple thank-you message. Food can be served at bridal showers. Treats such as cake and candy buffets can also be served for guests. Hosting
315-472: A woman's transition into motherhood. The baby shower is a family's first opportunity to gather people together to help play a part in their child's life. The new parents may wish to call on people to assist in the upbringing of their child, and help educate the child over time. People around the family, who care for them, want to be involved in the child's life, and a baby shower presents an opportunity for them to give gifts and be of help, showing their love for
350-404: Is a primary activity. Baby shower games vary, sometimes including standard games such as bingo, and sometimes being pregnancy-themed, such as "guess the mother's measurements" or "guess the baby". According to etiquette authority Miss Manners , because the party centers on gift-giving, the baby shower is typically arranged and hosted by a close friend rather than a member of the family, since it
385-525: Is being married. Guests are chosen from among the bride's personal friends, family, and other well-wishers. This would traditionally be limited to women guests, with a typical exception being the groom. The number of guests and their relationship to the bride varies widely. In Canada, among some immigrant communities parties in community halls with upwards of 300 guests were normal, while other cultures emphasized intimate parties with only close friends and relatives. Though many cultures have events before
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#1732772063356420-467: Is called Atha-gulem and done in the 8th month, with flowers and fruits, to cheer the woman in the late stages of her pregnancy. The ritual has more commonly evolved into a ritual that shares characteristics of a baby shower , where the friends and relatives of the woman meet, acknowledge and satisfy the food cravings of the expectant woman, and give gifts to the mother and the baby in 7th or 8th month of pregnancy. Yåjñavalkya Smriti verse 3.79 asserts that
455-406: Is common to open gifts during the party; sometimes the host will make a game of opening gifts. Whether and how a gift registry is used depends partly on the family's class, because wealthier families do not depend on the gifts received to care for the baby. Preparing a gift registry is a time-consuming and potentially fun activity for the parents-to-be. It may result in less personal gifts (e.g.,
490-420: Is considered improper for families to beg for gifts on behalf of their members. The pregnant mother, as well as her mother and mother-in-law, and any sisters and sisters-in-law are commonly considered too closely related to properly host a baby shower, but a more distant family member, such as a cousin, might be accepted. However, this custom varies by culture or region and in some it is expected and customary for
525-481: Is diapers and/or diaper-related items. The organization of the diaper party is typically done by the friends of the father-to-be as a way of helping to prepare for the coming child. These parties may be held at local pubs/bars, a friend's house, or the soon-to-be grandfather's house. In the United Kingdom , this is called wetting the baby's head , and is generally more common than baby showers. However, with
560-407: Is great divergence in details, which may be because the rite of passage emerged in more a recent era, before it receded into the background. The texts do not agree on whether this rite of passage was to be celebrated before or after pumsavana , early or late stage of pregnancy, or the nature of ritual celebrations. The texts also disagree whether Simantonnayana was a rite of passage of the baby or of
595-769: Is often assumed to mean that the expectant parent is "showered" with gifts. A related custom, called a bridal shower , may have derived its name from the custom in the 19th century for the presents to be put inside a parasol , which when opened would "shower" the bride-to-be with gifts. Traditionally, baby showers are given only for the family's first child, and only women are invited to party .... though this has changed in recent years, now allowing showers being split up for different audiences: workplace, mixed-sex, etc. Smaller showers, or showers in which guests are encouraged to give only diapers or similar necessities, are common for subsequent babies. Activities at baby showers include gift-giving and playing themed games. Giving gifts
630-697: Is performed, the terms used are Panchmāsa (fifth month), Satmāsā (seventh month) & Athamāsā (eighth month). For example term Athamāsā is common in Rajasthan , while Satmāsā in Uttar Pradesh . In Dogri language , the terms Thoaa & Reetā are common. In Konkani & Marathi (& probably in Khandeshi language also) the same ceremony is called Dohale-Jevan. In Marathi, term Choli Pangarana and in Kannada , term Kubsa todasodu
665-482: Is used. In Bengal , the name Saadh/Shaadh is common while in Odisha , the name Sada-khilai is popular. The names Shimant and Khodo bharvano is common in the state Gujarat . Baby shower A baby shower is a party centered on gift-giving to celebrate the delivery or expected birth of a child. It is a rite of passage that celebrates through giving gifts and spending time together. The term shower
700-588: The Simantonnayana ritual and until the birth, the woman is expected to not overexert herself, her husband is expected to be by her and not to travel to distant lands. Simantonnayana is known by different names all over India. In the Hindi belt , it is called Godh-Bharai or Seemant while in South India , it is known by the name Seemantham & Valaikappu . Depending upon the month of pregnancy it
735-456: The basic format has been relatively unchanged for generations, and emphasizes traditional gender roles. Sociologists like Beth Montemurro write that the ritual of the bridal shower "socializes women into the hyper-feminized traditional wife role," with its emphasis on the future role of the bride-to-be as family cook, homemaker, and sexual partner. Historian Elizabeth Pleck echoes this dynamic in pointing out that traditional shower gifts were "for
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#1732772063356770-411: The bedroom or the kitchen." But this role is more of an homage to the mothers and grandmothers than a reflection of how the bride-to-be will actually behave in the marriage. Although the format has remained relatively consistent, there have been some significant changes. An etiquette guide from the 1920s suggested showers should be "purely spontaneous and informal," with guests arriving unannounced at
805-413: The bridal shower falls to one or more close friends of the bride, often one or more of the bridesmaids . Close family members traditionally did not host bridal showers, however, it has become commonplace for mothers of the bride and groom or other members of the family to host or contribute to the event. Some organizations, such as social clubs or religious groups, host bridal showers for every member who
840-552: The bride-to-be's home, while a planning guide from the 1950s suggests more complex themes and games. Showers are often held during the afternoon or evening, but not generally as luncheons or dinner parties . They commonly take place four to six weeks before the wedding. Due to the prior history of showers being "purely spontaneous and informal", showers have not developed the same formal etiquette that has developed with respect to weddings. Invitations may be issued informally, by mail, telephone, or e-mail. As showers are explicitly
875-473: The desires of the pregnant woman should be satisfied for healthy development of the baby, to prevent miscarriage and her health. This rite of passage is regionally called by various names, such as Seemant , Godh bharai , Seemantham or Valaikaapu . According to the Paraskara Gryha Sutra , at the beginning of the ceremony, the pregnant wife seats on a soft chair and with caressing attention,
910-567: The dowry and allow her to marry the man of her choice. The earliest stories about these events have been known to originate in Brussels , Belgium around 1860. A frequently quoted legend traces the origin of this practice to the 16th or 17th Century Netherlands . However, there are also parallels with many dowry practices and the United States colonial or hope chest ( trousseau ) custom. A related custom practised in medieval England
945-448: The family. If it happens before the birth, it allows the new family to thank everyone. Baby showers are relatively new, having become popular only in the middle of the 20th century, but other celebrations and rituals associated with pregnancy and childbirth are both ancient and enduring. While continuing the traditions from the 1950s, modern technology has altered the form a baby shower takes: games can include identifying baby parts on
980-478: The growth of American cultural influence – accelerated through celebrities via social media sites like Instagram – baby shower decorations are becoming more common in the United Kingdom. Wetting the baby's head is traditionally when the father celebrates the birth by having a few drinks and getting drunk with a group of friends. There has been some controversy over these, with Judith Martin calling them
1015-551: The husband himself parts her hairs upwards from the forehead three times, first with a bunch containing an even number of unripe udumbara ( Ficus racemosa ) fruits and three bunches of darbha grass, next with a porcupines quill having three white spots and finally with a stick of the Viratara wood and a full spindle, chanting each time three Mahavyahrti s (great mystical mantras ), Bhur , Bhuvah and Svah . But according to Baudhayana different two verses are chanted. After
1050-403: The pregnant woman, the former implying it must be repeated for every baby while the latter implying it was to be observed once for the woman with her first pregnancy. The common element was the husband and wife getting together, with friends and family, then he parts her hair upwards at least three times. In modern times, the "parting hair" rite of passage is rarely observed, and when observed it
1085-404: The purchase of a store-bought item instead of a handmade one). As with gift registries for other gift-giving occasions, some guests appreciate them, and others do not. Some families discourage gifts, saying that they want "your presence, not presents", or organizing a different activity, such as a blessing ceremony. In the United States, the baby shower is the only public event that recognizes
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1120-403: The wedding may take place. The custom of the bridal shower is said to have grown out of earlier dowry practices, when a poor woman's family might not have the money to provide a dowry for her, or when a father refused to give his daughter her dowry because he did not approve of the marriage. In such situations, friends of the woman would gather together and bring gifts that would compensate for
1155-582: The wedding, bridal showers are most common in the United States and Canada. In the United Kingdom , bridal showers have been described as a "consumerist American idea" with "limited acceptability". In the UK, wedding presents are normally selected from a list provided by the couple, and delivered either at the wedding or by the shop, and sometimes displayed at the wedding. Nonetheless, bridal showers are sometimes held, and shower-planning services are frequently offered by wedding planners. In Australia and New Zealand,
1190-579: The word in print may be in the Grand Rapids Michigan Evening Press 22 June 4, 1904: "The ‘shower parties’ that through mistaken hospitality the wedded couple are forced to attend ..." and may derive from the custom in Victorian times for the presents to be put inside a parasol , which when opened would "shower" the bride-to-be with gifts. Many different customs have developed in different regions and social groups, but
1225-542: Was the Bride Ale: in Langland 's Piers Plowman (§ B.II.45) there is a reference to a bruydale. This was a feast held before the wedding day, at which the bride made beer and sold it to the guests at a high price. In the United States, bridal showers started in urban areas in the 1890s mainly among the upper middle classes. By the 1930s, bridal showers had spread to rural America. The earliest use of this sense of
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